Tania Marie Gaulin

For the Love of Tania

Today is a very sad day for our family, and I’m choosing to bare my soul to our friends and family of the sadness that is being felt for the tragic loss off our daughter Tania.

After suffering a traumatic brain injury from a fall in 2000, and making a recovery that was nothing short of a miracle, with the power of GOD’S grace, and answered prayer from thousands, she began a life of recovery under the watchful eye of our family and closest friends.

Tania recovered with all of her physical abilities except the sight in her right eye. This minor impairment seemed easy for her to overcome and she never complained, however the brain injury which effected her frontal lobe was a very different story. Her personality was altered, and her judgements were impaired.

Over the next 17 years her emotional health declined, improved, and plateaued and continued to rotate between the three.

She had good days and not so good days. Fear, joy, sadness, and laughter filled her days as she made the best of her roller coaster life, and again, she never complained. Tania’s perception was her reality, and in her mind, it was the rest of the world that had a problem. You see, when she had her injury and woke up at 3 am from a 2-week coma, she looked at me and smiled. We had been advised that she may awaken with anger and frustration, but no, she smiled. It wasn’t until a week after she came home that she shared a near death experience with us that would jolt the spirit of the most committed non-believer, and when she went back into a main stream world with hopes of love and appreciation for every day, she came face to face with the cruel reality of verbal and physical abuse due to her sadly misunderstood specialness. As much as she tried to fit in, it was difficult to watch as she struggled at every turn. Finally, in an attempt to fit in anywhere, she turned to the downtown streets of Calgary, where she found refuge with like minded people that excepted her for who she was.

Unfortunately, those same streets are fraught with danger. Even though she was well loved and protected by her family, she was lonely, and in an attempt to mask her loneliness, she began to self medicate with crack cocaine. Our worst fears for her suddenly became a nightmarish reality. Thankfully she has a selfless and extremely resilient mother that was there to rescue her and never gave up,  putting herself into dangerous situations. Combing the downtown streets, often as late as 2 or 3 in the morning, Helen would put on her “yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death” attitude and fearlessly tracked her down. My roll in these situations was to be available on my cell because if I were with her it would have been a threat and surely lead to confrontations. After a while her pursuits became familiar to the night shift of the Calgary police force and they chipped in whenever possible. Most of the time Helen found Tania, and Tania would sometimes resist but more times than not she would just smile as if nothing was wrong, get in the car and come home for a respite from the streets, a home cooked meal and love. Our door was never closed to her and she knew where her safe haven was. This continued over the course of the past 15 years with many heartbreaking stories in-between, some too detailed, and some too personal to share.

Tania felt that by being downtown, she was helping her friends with supportive council and encouragement. She carried a first aid kit just in case her assistance was required and never wavered from her faith in God. Then the seedy side of downtown began to take its toll and turned into abuse. Not only by drugs but by other people that through their own desperation would take her money from her and beat her up if need be.

Through educating ourselves about the options that were available through various government programs, Helen and I, with Tania’s willing participation- found housing, income assistance as well as psychological service from local hospitals. After years of trials and errors we recently found a program and finally felt that Tania had a fighting chance. Her income was in place, her housing was in place and with our Trusteeship and Guardianship order from the courts, we were able to assist with her financial and medical needs. Our concerns were always about her safety and protection beyond our own graves.

Six months into this new transition the all too familiar rebound occurred and Tania fell back into the street life only this time resulting in her death from an accidental drug overdose this past Tuesday, January 31st 2017 at the age of 28.

Even though this loss is devastating, we are grateful for the time we had with our beautiful daughter and the lessons she taught us about love, patience and compassion for others less fortunate.

When you see a troubled teen on the street or a homeless person in need please be generous. Not just with money but more so with compassionate consideration, and respect. They were brought into this world for a reason too, even if, just to touch your heart as you walk by.

Tania will be forever in our hearts, sadly missed and fondly remembered. We will laugh again, as we will remember the good times. She would like that.

We take comfort knowing that this happened in God’s time and it is beyond our understanding. We know she is in a better place.

Thanks to all of you, for taking the time to read this and allowing me to share.

A Celebration of Tania's Life will be held at Westside King's Church, 3939 - 69 Street SW, Calgary, AB on Wednesday, February 8, 2017 at 2:00 pm.

The link below for Canada helps connect directly to The Alex, specifically for Pathways

https://www.canadahelps.org/dn/13468 and choose "Pathways" from the drop down menu